Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the 11th

Wow! Damn, but that hurt.

Our opponents this time were the undefeated “Tarsus”; and we knew it would be tough. That said – the team we selected were strong, and we gave ourselves every chance of an upset. It wasn’t made any easier when half their team pitched up in Gauteng colours!

Once again we decided to field first. We knew from looking at the analysis that these guys were hot stuff in the field – so we needed to make sure that they scored a minimal amount. The bowling and fielding had to be spot on. Ruaan’s very first delivery managed to prise out a runout, and we were off to a flier. Indeed, the first over conceded just 8. Ettiene kept up the good work and with a catch off his last delivery kept them to just 4. Fred was smashed for a straight 4 off his second delivery, but kept it tight after that, and Darren managed to get another run out before the following ball was smashed for 6 in retaliation. So partnership up, and 33 runs on the board. Things needed to improve.

Well – improve they did, an extremely economical Colin forced a run out off his last delivery, before Darren was as tight as a ducks arse to concede just 5. Wayne put the icing on the cake with a run out first ball, before some pride was restored to their batting lineup with a straight 4. The final over was bowled by the energetic Ross, and a 4 three balls from the end was erased with a run out off the last ball; and 26 runs richer – the second pair departed.

In came their third pairing, and immediately started pinging nets before Wayne had one caught off the third ball of his first over. Colin was extremely economical once again, and with a catch off his second kept them to a mere 5. Kevin entered the attack and immediately deceived the batsman to clean his stumps up, before Ross finished off the pair with a run out off his final delivery to send them packing for 22.

The final two bats walked in, needing 19 to go past 3 figures. When Kevin had one caught off his penultimate ball – that target was looking unlikely. Fred bowled with furious pace, and aggression – frequently targeting the sensitive ribs, and produced a pearler to clean the batsman up first ball, and induce a run out off his penultimate. It needed a heroic effort from the rattled bats to post the 19 they required, and a smash off the third last ball of the innings to hit the back nets for 4 helped them get over the mark. Innings ended and a mere 102 the score.

So 103 to get – it would be tough. Just how tough our openers, Darren and Ross discovered. Mostly Darren, who was run out off his second last delivery of the first over, before being clean bowled then caught in successive balls one over later. A catch off the first ball of the third over really caused hassles, and the team was sitting at -5. A steady trickle erased the negative, but the total was going to be hardly exciting – a lonely 5 runs from the partnership and we were in severe distress.

Colin and Wayne took up the challenge, but when Wayne was run out first ball – things looked bleak. Fortunately – the partnership steadily rebuilt, until eventually Colin launched into one to send it high over the heads for 6. The joy was short lived tho’, and the final over saw some unbelievable glove-work by the opponents with 3 stumpings split over 2 wides to end the over without a single run off the bat, and 5 less runs on the board. The partnership had finished with just 19.

Our third pair walked in with a massive job to do – 80 still to get, and only 8 overs to get them in. Kevin and Fred went to work, slowly building up steam until a smart bit of work saw Fred stumped in the second over. Kevin watched the ball swing like a pendulum to end up stumped twice in the next over before some solid batting saw the partnership end with no further damage, and 24 runs to the better. It was a valiant effort, but too little too late.

The final pair walked in with an impossible task – 58 needed, and no time left. When Ruaan was cleaned by a scorcher third up, the drama was almost complete. Not even a huge six from his bat two overs later could resurrect the chase, and although Ettiene continually rotated the strike, the big nets remained out of reach. The final over saw a huge number of gift runs with 3 extras in a row, but the game was up already by that time. 24 added, and only 70 on the board.

It was a heavy defeat, but since it was against what looked like ex provincial players, and some seriously quick wicket keeping, there are lots of positives to take out of it.

Man of the Match would be Colin, who tried valiantly for his 15 runs, and managed 2 for 9 from his bowling.

Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the tenth

Looking at our record you would be forgiven for thinking I could start this piece with: “Another game, another loss.” But this team won’t kowtow for such nonsense! Far from it, we remain eternally competitive.

The team took to the field first up, whilst our opponents walked in, confident, swaggering. When Ruaan sent the ball way down leg three times in the opening over – that confidence seemed well placed. Russell made his debut, and bowled with raw pace. And, after some athletic commitment in the field yielded a run out, his final ball scorched through the gap to leave smoking piles of melted plastic where stumps used to reside; and the attitude had been well and truly adjusted.

Wayne, managed to create a run out, and two balls later a catch; before conceding two fours off the final two deliveries; and with it – the confidence returned. The final over bowled by Kevin was bunted to numerous nets, and the partnership ended with 26 on the board.

The second pair walked in; to face the limping menace that is Darren. The perils of underestimating your opponent showed immediately with a run out first ball; two dots followed before the fourth sneaked past the bat and clattered into the stumps; and Darren was on fire. Wayne picked up the pieces and smoked two clean bowled wickets in a row before the pressure of the hat-trick proved too much and he sprayed it wide. Final ball got smoked for 4, and he finished his spell with very credible figures. Danie took up the ball, and dragged the bat out of the crease first ball to set up a sharp stumping which Colin took full advantage of. Three dots later, and the over was up; only for Ross to get a run out first up. He kept it tight, and the partnership limped off – battered, bruised and only 3 runs richer …

Things started to slip slightly in the third partnership. Danie was smoked repeatedly to the far net for 3 maximums in a row. Kevin bowled a tighter line, but still didn’t manage a break through. It was up to Darren to bring back some respectability to the bowling. He did in fine style, with the final two deliveries bringing catches – the last one a group effort; with Danie fluffing the first grab, Ruaan backing it up and squirting it up too, before clutching it on the second take, with Danie wrapping his hands around it at the same time. Now that’s teamwork. Colin was punished in the last over for 2 maximums, and the partnership had restored some pride to the score line – adding 48.

The final pair walked in, and immediately Ross brought about some damage – a run out first ball, clean through to bowl him on the second, before keeping it fairly tight in the final four deliveries. Colin made amends by setting up a catch off his second, and then spoiling it by getting smashed for four off his last ball. Athletic fielding brought a run out from Ruaan first up, before Russ was smashed for max in the final over; and the team finished on 104.

So – over a hundred to get; and big Kevin and Dazzler to open. A mockery was made of the first ball – sent straight back to the bowler with interest for maximum runs; before Dazzler was run out on the last delivery. Some solid, no-risk batting followed, with Kevin stroking some violent 4’s and the partnership ended on 36 to take an early lead.

Next up, Colin and Wayne strode to the crease, moving things along slowly, but steadily until the final over was gifted to them with 4 extras and a few runs along the way to set us up beautifully, adding 38 to put us on 74.

Ross and Danie came together to continue the assault; and immediately there was trouble. Ross was repeatedly run out, whilst Danie succumbed to a stumping and a catch. Without any big nets being pinged, the wickets were hard to make up; and the partnership mercifully ended with the score just 7 runs to the better. So 24 needed to win, and the final pairing walking in. When Russ was run out off his first delivery, some nerves were clear; before Ruaan rectified the natural order of things by lacing a ball almost through the back net for 6. Runs flowed steadily after that; and the final over approached – with 7 needed from it. The first ball was smashed by Russ for 4; the second gift of a no ball. The third and fourth found the small nets, and with the game in the bag – Ruaan was left with the final delivery. It pitched enough outside of off to allow a Kallisesque leave; and we had done it. Scoreboard flashing 110 behind us.

Congrats to the team. You pushed it close to the wire – but pulled through again; thanks in no small part to some fantastic commitment in the field. Job well done.

Man of the match was Darren for his top score of 23, and unbelievable bowling of 4 for -3 …

Spin Doctors needed

I was listening to people rant about Eskom this morning, and it made me consider putting my viewpoint down for the betterment of people, and spin doctors everywhere. This whole debacle could have been handled so much better.

Yes, I'm aware that better management would have gone a long way to ensuring the mess never occured in the first place, but the milk is spilled, the coal burned or soaked, and the power out - so no use crying over it. Let's look at how to handle the situation from a crisis management point of view.

How much easier it would have been had the communication from Eskom been humble and contrite instead of bullyish and brash? If the word from the company had been along the lines of: "We fucked up. Sorry. We're working on fixing it, but we need your help." Instead they went with: "We can't give you enough you greedy bastards, reduce what you use now or we'll cut it off."

I have no issue with implementing measures to save electricity. In fact, I applaud them. I take truck with being told that it is my fault. Eskom initially went with the "help us" mode of communication, but then decided to threaten. My favourite part of this saga was the radio ad which said: "Due to customer's failure to save enough electricity we have had to implement load shedding again." No word of Eskom's failure to produce enough for the consumer to use.

I'm not trying to lay blame on government, or the parastatal. I'm pointing out that the problem lies not with the consumer but with the provider. In all service industries, even if the customer made the mistake, he didn't. How much more does this hold true when the customer didn't do anything wrong in the first place?

To strain the restaurant analogy further: We have a situation where the customer ordered sixteen hard boiled eggs, and got served 6, and is now being told it is his fault that there aren't any eggs left. Would you eat there again? What if it was the only choice?

For too long, companies that serve the average South African have given poor service and it has been ignored. It's high time that the situation changes.

Action Cricket Chronicles fit the 9th

What a rollercoaster of a game sports fans! Pity the cart fell off at the end of the trip …

Captain Tosser (not a derogatory term by any means) won the flipping coin toss for the umpteenth time in a row, and chose to put the runs up on the board. Out walked (or in Darren’s case limped) our intrepid opening pair, with Ross partnering the young Dazzler. When the first delivery fizzled past his (Dazzle’s) outside edge, almost everyone on the bench just dropped their heads down; and when the fourth ball popped straight into the bowlers hands in his follow through and erased the three runs made prior to it, we just let the heads stay down. The first upward turn came from Ross’s bat; and a sweetly struck straight drive burst through the fielder’s despairing dive and pinged the back net. The partnership ended on a marginal 29.

Colin and Attila were sent in to try and bolster the innings, and when Colin found the boundary with the fourth ball of the stand, the spirits were soaring again. They deflated quickly with a sharp catch one over later. Nevertheless, not even Attila being bowled through the gate could quite destroy our indomitable spirit, and the partnership ended on 17.

Kevin “wheelie king” Horne and myself trooped up, and Kevin immediately showed his aggression with a sweetly timed four in the first over. I plodded through – pushing singles, and Kevin rotated the strike powerfully, so that not even a double run out in the penultimate over could dampen the pace of our counterstrike; and the partnership added 32 to put us on course for our second score over 100.

JC and Ruaan stroked the ball powerfully pinging all the nets and duly moved us past the century mark to end the innings on 109.

So 110 runs to defend, and the mood was upbeat. Ruaan started the attack, and despite being shunted around for numerous small nets, he did set up a sitter which JC took easily to contain the opposition to just 8 from the first over. JC then took up the ball, and two balls later set up a catch of his own to take the air out of the opponents attack. Unfortunately, the next downward spiral was on its way – and it was a big one … I came on to bowl my medium pace and was treated with extreme disdain, smashed for a straight four and punted to every net in the entire arena. When Attila’s first ball went above head height over the batsman, on course to decapitate the umpire sitting above us, the nerves started to flutter. His next ball went miles down leg, his third overcorrected to end up several yards outside the off, and his fourth an overstep, just hitting the pitch with his fifth took the batsman by surprise and he only managed one. The tortured over finished two balls later – fittingly with a no-ball, and the partnership left satisfied with 41.

The second pair walked in cock-a-hoop, and had the stuffing knocked out of them by Colin’s first delivery flattening middle stump. However, Attila’s radar in the second over of his spell worked as badly as it did in his first. So much so that the final ball was delivered underhand, and smashed straight back past him for four. But then the coaster track moved upwards again, with big Kevin walking in. A run out off his first ball, a remarkable catch next ball up, a runout on the penultimate; and suddenly the opponents were losing steam. Darren bowled a reasonable over and managed two wickets – including a brilliant ball which clipped off stump by a coat of varnish. The partnership over, and just 20 to show for it.

This was about the time we really picked up steam. With a direct hit running out the striker off the first ball of Ross’s over, and again on the last ball. Kevin bowling another pearl to take his fourth wicket of the match. Ross striking twice once more in his final over (and throwing himself horizontally to try and take another one superman style with scant regard for his skin, and the hard concrete floor covered with industrial-strength-grass-burn-inducing matting), and a brilliant catch at short leg (well to be honest I stuck out my hand and it somehow stuck) off the first ball of Colin’s last over. Partnership done, just 16 from it, and at a comparative stage we were 1 run ahead.

All down to the final pairing then. Unfortunately, It was demon Hicks to bowl his luckless military medium, and the second ball was duly smashed for four. The over ended tightly, but the damage had been done to moral, and the fielding became slightly sloppier. Darren’s final over was smashed for four and six, and numerous nets; leaving the sense of inevitability looming. Not even the macho display by the captain after effecting a remarkable run out in his final over, or JC’s last ball uprooting middle stump could save the match, and we lost by the scant margin of 8 runs.

Man of the Match had to be Kevin for his belligerent top score of 19, and bowling analysis of 2 overs no maidens, 4 for -1.

Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the 7th and 8th

A double header. And as much as you may be groaning under the weight of this post, and the awful writing therein, imagine how much we were groaning under the double bill. The legs were jelly before we started. But at least we had generous quantities of Red Bull. It gives you wings …

The first game was a non-league game, against opponents in a higher league than us. Purely for grading purposes.

Ruaan, as is usual, won the toss and elected to field. Fred took up the bowling attack, and, steaming, sent down an over of fury – the first ball missing the stumps by a coat of varnish. However, as is usual – the faster the delivery, the sweeter the hit, and a straight four off the second last ball of the over spoiled his figures slightly. Ettiene, took up the reins and sent down a corker – setting up the bat nicely, before beating his defenses and bowling him neck and crop. Ruaan had less luck, and only a run out off the final ball restricted the scoring slightly; before JC, literally spitting flames, cleaned the bat up with the first ball of the over – a fast Yorker on middle stump.

The second pairing had demon Hicks bowling – and my medium pace was treated with the disdain it deserves off the third ball with a straight 4. However – the fourth produced a sitter, which dropped neatly through JC, bounced to me on my follow through, which I gathered awkwardly, fell over and demolished the stumps – batsman well short of his ground. Phew … When the next delivery was brilliantly caught by Ruaan at short square leg, the over had regained some semblance of order. Danie managed to draw the batsman out during his over and Colin gathered neatly to effect a simple stumping chance; while Kevin had a dream of an over, inducing two chances – one of which JC took brilliantly with his knees – erasing his earlier dropped sitter …

The third batter pair faired just as poorly, with poor running effecting 3 run outs, an excellently tight over from Colin conceding three runs and a runout, and a catch off Kevin’s first ball of his last over effectively keeping our opponents to 75 with just the last pair to go. Unfortunately, the last pair put on 47, 21 of which came off JC’s last over.

That meant we had a mammoth 123 to chase, and when the third ball took the shoulder of Fred’s bat, and leapt nastily into his eye – we were in trouble. Fred had to leave the field as he could barely see out of the eye, and a small blood clot had formed in the one corner. He’s at a specialist eye doc today just to be safe. Darren was substituted in for Fred, and immediately run out. The third over was the kicker. Catch off the first, then a hat-trick, three card trick – bowled off the third, run out off the fourth; and caught off the fifth. The final over rescued the innings slightly; producing 10, and steering the makeshift partnership to 16.

Ettiene and I came together, putting on 34 (the second highest stand) and for a change – I only lost my wicket once. Okay – so I scored just 8, but still … Ettiene was as usual, striking quickly and effectively to get 26.

The third partnership between Colin and Danie produced little fireworks, but some sensible cricket to put on a very credible 22. However, that left our final pairing of Ruaan and JC a mammoth 51 for victory. They tried, but ultimately ended their partnership on 21, and the innings on 93 – 30 runs short.

The second game was immediately afterwards; and despite panting like Jimmy Abbot after getting out of bed, Ruaan; JC and Kevin were all taking part a second time. This game was the business – a league game, and worth points. Ruaan once more won the toss, and this time – mainly because his breath was short – he chose to bat first.

Colin and Kevin opened, and produced sensible cricket, pushing the singles, pinging the nearby nets, and running smoothly to end unbeaten on 36. Yes – not a single wicket went down in the first four overs.

Darren and Jeff broke that trend, but only off the final over – racking up a formidable 46 before conceding that solitary wicket, and setting us up nicely at 84 after 8. The third pairing of robo-batter Wayne, and Ross the myopic, added a steady trickle of runs that not even 5 wickets could disrupt; and put us comfortably on just shy of 100 after 12.

The final pairing of Ruaan and JC started the slog, and after a huge over of 18, almost made the half century partnership; and steered the team to a brilliant 147!

With that target to chase the pressure would always be on the other side; and it showed. Colin got a run out off his third ball, and Darren produced an over that was tighter than a duck’s arse, conceding just 2 with a run out for a final analysis of -1/1. Jeff didn’t disappoint, with a sensible calm over, and Wayne chipped in with a wicket off his second last ball. 18 on the board, and 4 overs gone already. The second pairing made a better fist of it, but only managed 27 runs off the brilliant lines and lengths Jeff, Wayne Kevin and Ross bowled. After that, with still 102 to get off the remaining 8 overs, it was too much for the embattled enemy to bear. JC made mincemeat of the opponents, cleaning his up second ball; and inducing a suicidal run off his next delivery; while the remaining three bowlers kept the runs non-existant, and the wickets tumbling slowly. A mere 7 for the partnership, and the match wrapped up, a nearly impossible 96 needed by the final pair.

Darren made certain of victory pushing the batsman back so far he jumped on his stumps first ball, and gaining a brilliant runout off his second last; while Colin was air tight in the second, and half-way through produced a dolly of a catch. Ruaan sprayed it around a bit, with a no ball and two wides before JC finished the game, inducing a catch with the first ball of the final over; and, despite overstepping twice, conceding almost nothing. The other side finished on a measly 64, and the staggering margin of 83 runs for the VICTORY! It took some time, but the roll has started. Yesterday, the game, tomorrow, the league; and finally – the world!

The art of lunch

I was just reading a well written article on the state of pudgy cricketers, and I started thinking. That is always dangerous. The paragraph in questions was this:

For me - and this may just be a matter of age - the heyday of international weight gain was the 1980s, when such mighty lunchers as Mike Gatting and Ian Botham strode the world like colossuses (mainly because that's what they were). Gatting, of course, influenced the culinary policies of pavilions across the world, although I'm happy to say that rumours suggesting he used a funnel are entirely false. When Shane Warne bowled him with the Ball Of The Century at Old Trafford in 1993, his captain, GA Gooch, told waiting reporters, "he looked as though someone had just nicked his lunch". And a bit later, "if it had been a cheese roll, it would never have got past him".

Now what happened to that great institution - the long lunch? For myself, the answer is simple. Money, or rather the lack of it. But is that the truth for everyone? Surely the many masses still have enormous budgets and can encourage enormous bellies - feeding the habit so to speak. The world's restaurants have blossomed, but they are their busiest at dinner time.

I blame the fast food industry. That and the worlds employers. In our hurley burly world, the lunch hour is just that - an hour. I think I may start a revolution to get the lunch hour extended to what it was back in the early nineties ... when fast food would allow you to go to the bank, and do some shopping as well as eat; but if you didn't need to stand in the long queues, or feel the need to listen to terminally dreary music, then you could go out and enjoy lunch from around 11 to just after 2. Now if I could only get hold of the necessary cash.

Wow - what a day

Firstly, Eskom can just plain fuck off. The most important game in the season for Liverpool, the third tie between Liverpool and Arsenal in 6 days, and the return leg of the Champion's League, and Eskom load shed. I mean FUCK. Thankfully the reds won, but I missed out on watching an absolute crackerjack.

But on to today.

We had our appointment with the specialist today. He's got some damn expensive machinery there - probably why his rates are through the roof. But the news is good. Claudia and the twins are all perfectly fine. Twin 2, the smaller one, and the one with SUA is doing just great. All his organs are fine, his brain looks good, heart looks good, has two kidneys, all good; just a bit smaller. Currently estimated at 16g below his big brother (who it must be said is far from camera shy - he was opening his legs wide for the camera ... little porn star) but both are over 400g, and looking good. Just had to share.

Buying a stroller

This weekend was a very trying time. My wife and I needed to check out some items that we have to purchase. Cots, prams, car seats ... the list is endless. Now, we had done some research on the web (wonderful thing this Internet); and thought we had the perfect item. The Peg Aria Twin looked to be perfect, Claudia even liked the colours. So we trundled off to the new Peg shop near us, full of hope and, despite the potential black hole developing near my pocket, desire.

The shop was not a disappointment. In fact it was beautiful - the pram was right in our eye line as we walked in too. And it looked pretty good. We wandered around with it for a bit, up and down the aisles, testing the turning circle - as you do ...

Then - the ultimate test. Does it fold down small enough? After some in ital difficulty starting the fold, it all seemed ridiculously easy. One fold, one extra click .... hhhhmmmmm. Still a rather large, bulky rectangle shape. Oh, well - maybe I wasn't doing it right. After we found a shop attendant who was willing to help us - an almost impossible task considering we actually want to spend money - I discovered I wasn't doing anything wrong - that is indeed the extent of the fold. Damn. Maybe it'll fit ... So off we went to the car to check it out. Alas! Not in the wildest drug induced imaginings of L Ron Hubbard ...

So now we are in a dilemma. This was the best bet of twin prams sold in South Africa. There are literally no makes that fold smaller than the Peg. The only make we could find online was Combi - a states company that, as is depressingly normal, doesn't sell in South Africa. Now, how - pray tell - do I get this in the country? Grey importing may be a problem for the authorities; but it seems to be my ONLY resource. Unless I find someone who's travelling back from the States or some other first world country in the next few months.

After that, and a wee bit of an emotional cry, the rest of the weekend passed pretty well. Well that is until I managed to lock both of us out of the house. All because we had to test the dimensions of the Combi in the middle of the night. Okay, 8 pm, but still ... fortunately, we managed to break open the garage and retrieve the house keys. My hand is still aching, but it is better than spending the night outside.

Technicalities

I just read an excellent article on batting, and the technical aspects of it. From the Cricinfo article written by Suresh Menon:

There is more than one way to be successful. More than one way to be effective. All batsmanship can be reduced to the moment when the bat actually meets the ball, and then the only rule is: balance is all. Watch the great players - bats may come down from second slip, the ball might be met on the rise or away from the body, the wrong hand might lead the shot. Yet at the moment of contact, there is perfect balance.

Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the 6th

In a dramatic break with tradition, a scant 2 days rest was allowed before the team was called once more into the breach. And it was a stupid time to play, 10 at night is ridiculous. To top it off, the team was faced with table topping competition. Slaughter was on the cards.

Unsure of conditions, and full of fight, we took to the field first. Unsure, not only of conditions, but of the substitute player, one Ken by name. It was clear a herculean effort would be required. JC stood at the peak of his run up. The tension was thick. When the first ball was smote for a massive 4, the weak among you would have curled up and wept in fear of the beating that would surely follow. Not JC. Not this team. His second ball snuck through the defenses and cleaned the stumps up. The fielding turned electric, with only singles coming from the flashing blades of the opposition. And when Ruaan replicated the first over, by smashing the stumps down in the second – the team started to believe. That belief was well rewarded by a stunning catch in the third (bowled by Kevin), a beautiful piece of fielding bringing a run out in the fourth (Wayne’s first over); and to cap it off – the final ball of the first pair was caught superbly to send the opposition reeling out with just 15 on the board.

The second pair wobbled in, the surely unfamiliar figures of 15 flashing above them … Ross stood there, mean, glaring. And although no wickets fell during that first fiery over, only 6 runs resulted. Wayne took up the ball eagerly, hoping to replicate his first over, and placate the hounds baying for blood … He was so eager, he overstepped on the first, but more than made up for it when a low chance was taken brilliantly with the third. Just to mess with the minds of our opponents, after the pint sized menace that is robo-bowler, the giant Kevin scared the batters stupid forcing a runout from his fourth delivery and finishing the over with two dots to set up a thrilling final over for the pair. Colin bowled it, and the wickets tumbled, with an excellent catch off the second, and a runout off the penultimate ball. Two pairs down, and only 35 on the board.

The Bun started the third pair off, and forced another runout with the penultimate ball of his first over. Ross then brought it back spectacularly, with two wickets including a stumping off the final ball. Attila finished off his allotted overs with a catch off his second ball, before having the spell spoiled by a phenomenal smashed straight six off his final delivery. Colin then took up the attack, and despite gifting a few runs, managed to entice a catch to send the pair back with 38 to their names, and the opponents still shy of the hundred mark.

The final two walked in to face their fate, and the unknown element. Ken did alright starting us off, with no wickets, but a tidy line conceding just 7. JC then stormed in, and managed to induce two catches in two deliveries just before the end of the over. His hat-trick was denied unfortunately. Ruaan then took ball in hand and was immediately smashed straight down the ground for a sensational six. He brought it back manfully, and ended up only conceding 12 from the over. The final over fell to the unknown Ken, and he complied by gifting the opponents 4 extras, before managing a single wicket to save some value from the over. And that was it – a mere 106 on the board.

Alas, The heroics on the field did not help a tired team find the mettle to withstand an excellent attack. With a runout first ball, and a catch off the second, the scene was set. Ross and Attila attempted to up the tempo, but were beaten twice while advancing down and the opposing wicky was too good to miss out. Nevertheless, 10 runs from the first pair was healthy, and well in line with the 15 the opponents made, just not quite enough.

Colin and Wayne took up the mantle shortly afterwards, and despite a valiant effort, managed to add very little, advancing the score by a mere 7. Mostly due to Wayne having his circuits slightly frazzled, and being stumped 4 times. The final two balls of their partnership were also dots, just to rub in the pain.

Kevin, and Ken, took up their weapons and set about rebuilding the innings. Wickets tumbled in regular succession from the one end, whilst runs trickled off Kevin’s bat; and the game was pretty much up. JC and Ruaan walked in needing 73 runs to tie, that was simply a bridge too far. The two resurrected their partnership, and added 33 flawless runs, but ultimately, the challenge was just out of reach.

What a performance from the team though. Brilliant fielding, and superb bowling was let down by some ordinary batsmanship. Now, if only we could get the two elements to gel …

Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the 5th

Action Cricket fan’s welcome to your weekly wrap up.

Friday was the scene of yet another exciting game. Once more, our intrepid captain won the toss, and this time, with the lights shining down, decided to field. The team gathered at the top of the wicket, bowed our heads (mostly in prayer) and let the halls ring to the sound of our war-cry: Woes.

The openers stepped out and nervously took up guard; while Fred pawed at the ground and a tiny lick of flame appeared out of his left nostril. Three balls later, the ball shot off the outside edge, bounced off the net and nestled eagerly in my cupped hands. What a start! The first over saw 1 down for just 3. Ruaan took up the challenge, and buoyed by the fire of the first over, struck with his very first ball – running out the non-striker. His final delivery was just as good, beating the attempted walk down the track, and allowing Colin the opportunity to demolish the stumps. Two overs down, and just 4 runs. Brilliant. Kevin and Danie finished off the first pair, gifting a few runs; and allowing a straight four of the last ball of the skin. But still – the first pair had made a miserable 33.

On came a second pair, and young Jeff took up the bowling attack. A straight six off the last ball of his over spoiled the figures slightly; and then it was the turn of yours truly to do battle. Immediately, there were dividends; and some sharp fielding saw the stumps fly with the batsman well short of his ground. Two balls later, and a carbon copy. So 2 wickets in the over, and -1 to the score. Danie finished up his allotted overs next, recovering from a smashed six off his first ball to only give up 14 runs; and then it was the turn of Colin to finish the pair off. 9 runs later, and they trudged back having added another 33.

The next pair were faced with young Darren, and although no wickets fell – he did only concede 9 runs. Kevin entered the attack, and unfortunately, the batters were finding the nets with ease, pinching 10 runs from the over. Jeff took over the challenge, and although the net’s dried up, a huge boundary off the final ball turned the over into a decent one for them; and it was up to young Dazzler, with his final over to try and stem the flood. A straight six of the first ball didn’t help – but he found the perfect line after that, and it eventually paid dividends with an excellent catch taken off the last delivery helping to limit the partnership to just 39.

The final batting pair wandered in (having carelessly misplaced a player) and Colin’s excellent line provided the opportunity for another run out on the 5th delivery. A final ball boundary restored some pride to the batters, and then I once more took up the ball – hoping for a repeat of my first over. It was not to be; and despite a beauty that pegged back off stump on the 5th ball of the over – they snuck 7 more runs, and it was up to Ruaan to stem the flow. 2 balls later, and the stumps were sent flying. A further 2 balls later; and again the furniture was disturbed with the batsman way out of his crease. Fred took up the challenge of closing their innings down; and although no wickets fell – only 11 runs came from the final slog; and with 35 more on the board, the innings was brought to a close.

So 142 was the target – pretty mammoth, and entirely due to lack of penetration with the ball. Could our bats live up to the pressure?

Fred and Kevin walked out with steely determination glittering in their eyes. Risk free cricket is what was produced, and with singles being nudged, nets being found and flawless running; they walked out 4 overs later with ALL wickets intact, and 45 runs on the board. We were off to a flyer!

Unfortunately – I was next up. My batting partner was the young Dazzler, and after a nudged single, it was me to face. A brilliant yorker was produced and the middle stump clattered out of the ground. Bowled first ball – oh the shame. A run out 2 balls later; and the score board had hardly moved by the end of the over. The grove started to come back after that horrendous start, but when the ball edged off the inside half of the bat and landed on my leg stump the rot was too far gone. I managed to haul myself up to an even zero; but if it wasn’t for Dazzle on the other end finding the boundary steadily we would have had very little to take from the partnership. We did manage to add 15 before the torture ended.

Colin and Danie were next up; and their bowlers were tasting success. Wickets tumbled, and so despite numerous boundaries being struck by Colin, the partnership added just 21; and we were up against it.

Ruaan and Jeff made up the final pairing; and with a hopeless task before them, they settled on the brave approach. Hardly any wickets, a steady trickle (rather than a gusher) of runs, 25 for the partnership; and we had crossed over the 100 barrier; but fallen 30 odd short of the target. Kudos must go to the team for the fight they showed, and the fact that we crossed over the century mark. It may have been a loss, but it wasn’t all bad.

Till next time.

A day of concern

We had our 20 week scan today. The twins are enormous, and quite definitely boys. They take after their father. The one twin, the larger of the two, was behaving very well; and being very cooperative. it is amazing what they can do nowadays; the doc spent 30 minutes scanning, measuring, poking and prodding every conceivable part of the baby. All is in perfect health.

Twin two was a little less cooperative; covering his heart with his arm, and moving his head too close to his brother's. It was very trying. On the other hand, almost everything looks perfect. All except the umbilical cord. The doc could only see one artery; which is not a good thing. It could have been bad positioning, or it could be that the twin has SUA. I looked it up. Wiki says that:

It is important to note that a diagnosis of SUA, while anxiety provoking, is in no way a guarantee that a fetus is at risk for other problems in utero or after birth. Especially encouraging are cases in which no other soft markers for congenital abnormalities are visible via ultrasound.

And all the other soft markers looked good. A slightly more reliable source than the wiki confirms most of that: womens-health.co.uk

So, we are booked in to see Professor Ermos Nicolaou, who is the foremost expert in fetal development. That's on April 9. I'm very nervous.

Other than that - we're playing action cricket again this afternoon - so expect another long-winded report soon.

The circle of life

Last night was the monthly book club for the girls. This is a very American ritual, whereby the women all get together to drink and discuss on their respective male companions. So, while this monthly meeting was going on, I invited one of those "respective males" around to bash controllers while trying to get little pixels to do what you want on a PlayStation.

The game of choice is FIFA 08. And while the game may sparkle prettily on the PS3, on my PS2 it is less gorgeous, and downright irritating. 8 games were played in all, and only about 6 goals in open play. Plenty of penalties though - every shoot out I lost - and the occasional result in normal time - all of which were scored by me. The point of this little narrative was really just scene setting. You see, pizza arrived sometime during the festivities, and on the way up my friend spotted a squishy, lethal looking brownish and relatively large eight-legged freak. Now I am marginally arachnophobic; less so since I got married and had to kill the bloody things regardless. And this ugly thing reminded me of the occasion that passed me by some months ago.

I took a load of washing to the machine, opened it up and swore loudly. For in the machine was some brightly coloured clothes, and in my arms was a mighty collection of whites. So I dumped the clothes on the floor, and pulled the smaller grouping of clothes from the washer. Turning back to the first pile, I was horrified to see this brown, squishy, fat spider come wandering out of a trouser leg.

Now the fact that I was carrying these clothes in my arms; or that my wife could have tried to pull the pants on without looking; persuaded me to kill the little menace. I turned around, grabbed some paper towel, turned back to squish it, and leaped a foot backwards in panic. There was no sign of the furry creature. I searched tentatively and in increasing panic for a half hour before conceding defeat.

And now here it was - two or more months later - outside my front door. I reacted bravely, and somewhat evilly, and stomped it into the ground repeatedly. This morning it was being devoured by many tiny ants. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

Oh - and the first test between SA and India is looking good - McKenzie and Smith put on 132 for the first, and McKenzie was still going strong when I last looked at the score - nearing his hundred. Looks like this could be a fascinating match up.

Edit: Makkers fell short by 6 runs. Bugger.

Weekend Wrapup

This is a somewhat random post. I'm going to be skipping around a lot, so bear with me ...

First off, I just need to say how disappointed I was about the Liverpool loss to Manchester United on Sunday at Old Trafford. To be honest, Man U deserved the win, Liverpool was playing far to square on the defensive line, and Mascherano acted like a little whiny brat. Doesn't make the loss any less hurtful. I can take a little comfort from the fact that it took the Red Devils almost 50 minutes to score their second despite Liverpool being down to only 10 men. And despite the Liverpool defense being so square. Ah well ... to the triple header against the gunners we go.

That Sunday was full of disappointment. As if the Liverpool loss wasn't enough, Arsenal failed to hold Chelsea. That meant that Man U opened up 6 point lead at the top. The tears would have flowed freely, if the whisky had been stronger ...

Fortunately Monday was a public holiday. I'm so happy that the Romans nailed that man to a tree and then spread chocolate eggs around for all the sad people to eat. It really helped get over the abysmal sporting weekend. I spent the day lounging with my wife. Her tummy is now classified as "really gorgeous and big". In fact I lay last night with my ear pressed firmly against the side of her stomach in the vain hope of hearing the little ones kick or something. In point of fact I did hear something, but it was probably a tomato being digested ... I'm going to delude myself that it was the kicking of one of my sons, it'll help me get over the fact that my wife can feel them and I can't.

I'll do what I want

I was listening to the radio on the way home the other day. The DJ was speaking about traffic fines, particularly speeding fines, and camera speed law enforcement. This one guy calls in and says that he doesn't get fines because he doesn't have his licence plate attached to his car.

Now he seemed very proud of this achievement and with good cause too. It is the sort of thing you like to leave as a legacy. When his grieving family surround the grave, holding a box containing the few bits they could find after a high speed accident, the legend emblazoned on the tombstone will read: "Here lies a man who never paid a fine. His licence plates kept falling off."

He isn't even bucking the trend. As I ride around town in my golf, I see numerous cars that spend so much on the vehicle, and yet have such shoddy glue. Beemers, Mercs, 4x4's and other monstrously expensive rides abound, with not a licence plate among them. Not ALL of these luxury vehicles are in that category. There are plentiful numbers of luxury car drivers who do indeed obey the law.

And don't get me wrong. I don't agree with speed law enforcement in this country. The South African metro police seem to have misunderstood the purpose of speed laws. They are not there to make money. Surprisingly, speed limits are there to try and limit the number of accidents. But it is the principle of obeying the law that I'm concerned with here.

This idiot, with his licence late lying shamefully out of sight, I am positive complains until blue in the face about the lawlessness in the land. Yet he is blatantly, and proudly, breaking those self same laws. This is not some game where you can pick and choose which part applies to you, and which doesn't. The law which states you must not kill each other is on the same document as the one which states you must drive a fully licenced vehicle and display the licence prominently on both front and back of the vehicle at all times. The crimes are not in the same league, but they are both crimes.

I'm not saying that I don't speed. I've done it before. I've been caught. I've paid my fine.

If you break the law, acknowledge it, and make reparations, you are miles ahead of those who break the law and avoid prosecution. Armed robbery was simply the next step in a long line of minor bits of stealing.

Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the 4th

Once more into the breach dear friends!

The third league game, and fourth overall and we still search for our maiden victory. Fear not! South Africa took 12 test matches for their first victory (9 for their first draw). Hope springs eternal!

The one thing we haven’t lost yet is the toss. Once more Ruaan called correctly; and this time chose to field first. The decision seemed an excellent one to begin with. Ettiene steamed in and conceded very few runs, and even managed to pick up a wicket via run out. 1/1 at the end of the first. Good times. Ross took up the mantle, and immediately sent the ball miles outside the off to concede a wide. Three balls later, he overstepped, and so spoiled what was a good looking over, with again only 4 runs coming from the bat. Jeff took the yellowish leatherish ball and proceeded to show Ross exactly what he thought of that overstep, by doing it on his first delivery. He repeated it for good measure with his second, before knuckling down to finish the over with no wickets for 10. Darren limped up to the plate, and bowled a reasonable line, but conceded 13 runs in the over without reward.

Time for a partnership change, and Jeff took up the challenge. This time, the overstepping was not an issue, but 8 runs ensued. The ship was leaking very slowly … Darren limped up again, but this time his line was impeccable, conceding just 2 runs before inducing two catches with his last two deliveries. So 4 runs from the first 2 overs of this partnership … an excellent time to introduce Dano into the attack. 7 runs and one no-ball later, it was the turn of the inimitable JC to restore the spirits. He immediately brought rewards, inducing a catch of his first delivery. 4 balls later, he had his second – stumped. Two partnerships down, and the score on only 46.

The tension was almost palpable, and the captain stepped up to the mark. 14 runs later, including a heave for 4 off the last ball, and the pressure was building on us. Dano stepped up to his mark, and despite a reasonable couple of balls, peppered the leg side twice to end up with none down for 11. The partnership was gaining momentum, and it was left to Danie to try and slow it down. His first ball was smote for a mighty six, and his final delivery smashed for 4, and things were looking black. Ross came back to finish it off, and immediately stifled the flow of runs, his first 3 balls went for just the 1 run. A minor pressure valve opened with a wide, before some attempted sneaky running led to the first and only wicket to fall in the partnership. A leg side delivery opened up the door for an extra ball to be bowled, and it was duly smashed for another boundary, spoiling an otherwise brilliant final over.

The final pair swaggered on, buoyed by the success of the partnership before them. Danie stood at his mark, visualizing the ball hitting stumps. The air crackled with energy. The delivery sizzled into the turf, the bat flashed down, and the ball looped up to be safely pouched. Two balls later, and the memory of that first ball wicket was erased with a smashed four. Not to be outdone, Danie took a wicket with his fourth, before the fifth found the boundary. Despite the two fours, the over cost only a measly 4.

Ruaan stepped up to the plate, and some brilliant fielding earned him his first wicket in the match, off the second ball of the over. The third was smashed straight back for a violent six, before Ruaan found the stumps and sent them flying. His final ball was dismissively sent to the boundary, and young JC walked to his mark. But the magic of his first over was gone. A overstep first up, and thereafter every ball found the netting, and runs leaked. The final over was left to the strike bowler, Ettiene. But once again, the second over of a spell failed the high mark of the first, as a leg side wide, a smashed 4, and a straight six could hardly be erased by the single run out …

A respectable effort despite the third partnership, and a target of 136 greeted the team on their arrival at the crease. JC and Ruaan, leading from the front, took up the first deliveries. The ball was poked into corners, runs taken on a whim, singles flowing like wine; but the boundaries seemed a bridge too far. A solitary four from the blade of Ruaan, and an uncharacteristic double wicket in the last over for JC saw the partnership put on 18. A better start than had come before for us, but hardly the 32 they made first up …

Jeff and Ross took up the reins … The first over saw some electric fielding, and some sloppy running give 3 run outs and a catch for good measure. When the second over saw a run out first ball, lesser teams would have slumped their shoulders and possibly curled up and cried on the floor. But no! a few pushed singles, and a straight driven 4 was the response, and the momentum was back up. One more run out, and one last catch restricted the partnership to 11, 3 shy of their second partnership, and almost 20 runs adrift.

In came the double D’s, Darren and Danie. Great things were expected, and a run out first ball did much to damage the reputation. A catch off the second last ball of the first over erased what little pride had been restored with the imperious four struck by young Dazzler third ball up, and the game was truly on. The feat was replicated in the next over, and, even more impressive, no wickets fell. Runs steadily flowed through the third, and even when the final over produced back to back catches, the partnership was still the best of the innings, and still hugely shy of their massive third partnership, and we were reeling – needing 80 odd from the last pair.

Ettiene and Dano strode to the crease, knowing that a win was near impossible from here. When Dano was bowled off the second delivery he faced, the task became monumental, and when he was bowled again – two balls later, well … The runs flowed slowly, but steadily from the one end, and wickets flowed just as steadily from the other. The big D was stumped off the last ball of the second last over, and Ettiene decided that he better hit some boundaries. He managed just the one, before the final delivery was sent down to Dano, and fittingly shattered the stumps for the third time. 11 had been added, and the game was theirs by 73 runs.

It was, despite being yet another defeat, a great game. And the scoreboard doesn’t do justice to the fight shown by all on the field. It was also immensely enjoyed, and played in excellent spirit. Hang tight – that win is surely just around the corner.

The halfway point

We are at the halfway point. Well, it's only halfway because we're expecting twins. That means that we are scheduled for a c-section at 38 weeks. Of course, that is assuming we make 38 weeks.

So we may, or may not, be halfway. In fact we may be somewhat over halfway. I'll start again ...

We're at 133 days today, and at least halfway to the birth of our twin boys! Champagne all round! Except for the carrier of the twins, who is not allowed to drink. Claudia is looking gorgeous at the moment, with her round tummy sticking out like a convenient shelf. It must be really uncomfortable for women tho'. I think we should reconsider the entire exercise.

It also means I have to seriously start working on the nursery. This poses numerous problems which must be overcome. For I am a pack rat - and I can blame my mother. I am also lazy - for which I can't blame anyone (bugger). And so my study, soon to be the home of squealing twin baby boys, is currently flooded with bits of broken pc, a small deciduous forest of paper, and many widgets of unknown design or purpose. The mountain is mindboggling, and frankly terrifying, and yet - the due date is coming ever closer. The horror overwhelms me.

Besides the terror of this hideous project, I am also staring into the abyss that expenses have eaten into my budget (or would have if I had a budget). Have you ever investigated buying a twin pram? In this dark corner of the world, most shops have many models of singleton prams on display. Twin prams, on the other hand, are in short supply. I'm not sure about you, but I like to fondle the pram lovingly, attempt to break it, fold it and drive it before spending one iota of my jealously guarded cash on it. This is nigh on impossible. Oh for a tactile version of the interwebnets!

Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the 3rd

And this brings us up to date:

The second game of the season was upon us on Friday, the third we have played including the grading game, and the third consecutive loss.

I’m starting to feel a little like Bangladesh here. Once again, we won the toss (as they did); once again we decided to bat first (as they did) and once again we were outplayed (as they were). Oh the misery.

Things started badly. Our intrepid openers, Colin and Danie, walked out full of purpose. The lights glaring harshly down upon them, throwing shadows into sharp relief. And immediately fell into problems. Colin was out first ball. The second wasn’t much better, with the stumps flying backwards potentially damaging their wicky with shrapnel. However, the first injury was Colin, who pulled his hamstring, and was man down by the end of the first over. JC, ever the trooper, walked in to help him out. Wickets continued to fall at regular intervals, Colin hobbled through the first 4 overs, JC ran madly from end to end, and the entire partnership managed to add a nice round 0 by the end of it.

Full of fear (although it was probably the flu more than the fear) I shuffled in, trying manfully to hide behind my partner, Fred. Fortunately, he is broader of shoulder than I, and so they hardly noticed me. Unfortunately, after Fred smote the first ball for a mighty 6, I was on strike. The bowler snorted, harrumphed, angry at being dismissively smashed, and promptly took my wicket out of the ground. I recovered – lacing the next delivery for 4, before promptly being run out. Things were not going well. The fielding was electric, the wickets tumbled, but the partnership somehow reached a positive number. A small positive number – but a positive number none-the-less. We made 5.

Darren, our walking injured, and Ross walked in to face the rampant opposition. Poor JC was again called on to run for young Dazzler, who started positively. Ross provided a perfect foil – pushing ones until the final ball was pitched in the slot and he drove gloriously for 4. An over was complete without a wicket going down! Was there a twist to this tale of woe? No. Although, by far the best partnership of the innings, it was still woefully small at 34.
The final pairing of Ruaan and the, by now exhausted, JC took up the challenge. Wickets didn’t fall quite a regularly as with the first two partnerships, but fall they did, and the runs flowed, rather than gushed. They fought manfully to get us to a competitive total – but 39 from 12 overs was too bad a start to properly recover from, and they added just 24.

With poor JC basically crawling on his wobbling pins, Darren limping in, Colin barely moving on his busted hamstring, and myself snorting and coughing up my lung it was a sorry group of intrepid cricketers that took the field to try and defend the woefully small total. We could only hope that the opposition were as weak with their batting as they were strong on bowling … when the first over conceded 12 runs, the third 17 and fourth 22 we knew that was a vain hope. Not a single wicket fell in the first partnership, and they left in the comfortable position of 57 in 4 overs …

The first wicket came in the second partnership, courtesy of a run out off yours truly … Danie followed suit with two in his first over before the bats fought back, thumping 30 runs from the next two overs, one of which was bowled from a standstill by the hamstrung Colin. The fielding was awful. JC dropped an absolute sitter, numerous throws went so wild that at one stage the bats ran two overthrows, and I dropped two stingers that I really should have held. We were as bad as England against New Zealand, but without the benefit of being in a position of strength. The target was overhauled by the end of the second partnership.

For the remaining eight overs we needed to not only stem the flow of runs, but take numerous wickets, and we failed in both tasks. This despite the brilliant efforts of the untiring Ross, who took a marvelous catch from close quarters, which literally doubled him over, and then a second off his own bowling. By the end of the third partnership, our score had been more than doubled by our opponents, and the final pairing, despite being the weakest of their entire team, hammered home the advantage.

We were outplayed, but the spirits remained good – JC played backstop with little complaint, and still more fire (threatening to bean the opponents with his bullet arm); and Colin kept wicket, despite falling to the ground in agony on every delivery. A win must surely be in the near future. If not – well at least we’re having fun. Sortof.

Action Cricket Chronicles - fit the 2nd

This was the second game (first of the league), and originally written on Friday, 7 March 2008:

Welcome sports’ fans! The season for Action Cricket started off last night, and like the tortoise, it was a very, very, slow start …

Ruaan won the toss for the second time in a row, and perhaps feeling that the decision last time had been poor, reversed it and decided to bat. In walked the intrepid openers, Darren (who had been granted a runner on prior agreement) and Ross. The start was steady, with the first 3 overs yielding 27 runs without loss. The final over of the partnership produced 2 wickets with almost no runs meaning the partnership ended on 25. Darren was the hero, striking 2 fours and numerous singles to end with a personal score of 21 without loss. Ross fared less well, not finding the boundary at all, and ending with two wickets down for a net score of 4.

Without too much fanfare, the second paring of Colin and Jeff walked in to face the (it must be said) medium skill of the opposition bowlers. These two steadily stole runs, and struck one boundary to go with 2 wickets and end on an extremely respectable 27. Honours even, with Colin producing composed 17, and Jeff an slightly more sedate 10.

Then the weak link. The Bun and the Biker. Pleading ignorance of the rules (which I must admit I knew nothing of either) the third ball produced a wicket. Apparently you have to run of the third miss. The Bun promptly missed 3 in a row and was stumped. Kevin and Attila tried to repair the damage, but lost wickets at regular intervals (5 in total) and so only managed 5 for the partnership, all from the bat of the Biker. Bun did better than Dano last time, and managed to offset his wickets with runs to end on a symmetrical zero.

The final paring went in, hoping to repeat the heroics of last time. Not quite as successful (the last time they produced a huge 34 run partnership) but still relatively good with runs coming regularly and only 2 wickets going down, one of which was that pesky third ball stumping. 23 runs the result, very evenly split (12 to JC and 11 to Ruaan) and the final score read a respectable 80.

The opposition openers came in to face the quick fire wrath of Colin, who repaired the minor damage of almost 2 runs every ball with a catch off the last ball of the over and had them 1 for 4. Jeff, the new ball partner, struggled with his line, and conceded 9 runs from his first. JC took up the hunt, and immediately did a Steve Harmison, spraying it around for the first 3, and being clobbered for 6 on the second last ball of the over. Ross was the final bowler, and managed to stem the flood of runs by taking two wickets and conceding very few to end with -2 and with it, their first partnership for 23.

The next partnership was where the game fell apart. Kevin, after overstepping twice was truck for a four, and managed to end with 0/10. Darren took up the assault, and immediately got nailed for two boundaries, ending with 0/15. The Bun was laid into with 3 boundaries including a massive six of the second last ball, and added two leg side wides, just to show he could. And Darren ended a miserable day with the ball by being hammered for 4 boundaries in a row, the first of which was a six – just for good measure. Second partnership over, and no wickets down for 67! At this point, it is likely a lesser team would have collapsed on the floor sobbing like babies. But not us. Oh no – it was more like a heart wrenching sob of anguish dredged up from the bowels of the earth. But they soldiered on. Shoulders were squared, chins jutted forward prominently, and brows knit in concentration.

The third partnership started off with Ruaan bowling a fiery spell and the batters managed just 7 before the Biker burst forth and immediately put his last over to shame by taking 2 wickets for -4. The reeling partnership had the knife dug in deeper by the Bun, who bowled a tight line conceding just 5 runs, before the standout bowler for us, Ross finished off a great bowling performance with a very credible 1 for 5.

However, despite the heroics, the final pair walked in, in the comfortable position of being 27 runs ahead. Colin started them off with a sweet boundary on the second ball, and so managed to concede 13 runs in the first over. JC took some stick with his first ball being struck for 4, before coming back to take a wicket and end with 1 for 7. Jeff managed to get a catch, and it should have been followed by more if Darren didn’t have as bad a time behind the stumps as he had bowling at them, but still Jeff managed to finish with 1 for none. Before Ruaan finished it off tiredly by being struck for a four and a six to end with none for 18.

The match was theirs, by a staggering margin of 64 runs. The team retired, exhausted, and trying to rebuild after a poor start.

Let the games begin!

I originally wrote this on Monday, 25 February 2008. Here it is in all it's glory:

This Friday just past saw the grading game of the Action Cricket team. The game went similarly to the first test for Bangladesh against South Africa. Lots of positives, but ultimately unsuccessful.

The raw numbers paint a bleak picture, with us conceding 84 runs in their 16 overs, and only managing 55 in response.

Things started excellently, with Ruaan winning the toss and electing to field. The pitch was hard, without much chance of breaking up, and had been well swept. Ideal for batting. However, with the relatively inexperienced team at his disposal, Ruaan decided that chasing a target would be much easier than setting one. The slab of concrete wasn’t going to change much between innings either …

The opening pair of the opposition fought through the netting and strode out to the middle, with our war-cry (“Woes”) ringing in their ears. JC – the premier strike bowler – pawed at the ground and set off to bowl his blistering pace. The first over was relatively tight, conceding just 8 runs. His strike partner, the inimitable Jeff, started poorly, with two wides, but then settled down. His fourth delivery produced the first wicket, caught at long off. The remaining overs, bowled by the feisty Fred and randy Ruaan, conceded a further 20 runs between them, and the first batting pair trudged off to a respectable 30.

5th change brought on Dano, who started with 2 no balls, but then bettered the performance with a catch off his third delivery. Danie did a great job holding up an end, with no boundaries off his first. The next over saw myself take up the ball, and bowl 2 no balls. The incredible lack of pace saw the batsman overbalance reaching for the third, and with the ball lodged firmly in our wicky, dazzling Darren’s fat rolls, it was a simple matter to fall on the stumps and get our first stumping. This heroic act complete, he limped to the bowler’s end ready to turn his arm over. 2 run outs later, and the second batting pair trudged off for another 30.

Then things started to change. The next 4 overs saw 4 wickets for 21; and the final four an emphatic 7 wickets for just 3 (final over was an incredible 4 for -9, bowled by Ruaan).

With a final cry of Woes ringing around the stadium, the sides swapped roles, and our opening bats (Jeff and Darren) took the field. A frightening 4 run outs, 1 stumping and 2 catches later, and they were off, limping and sweating buckets. The partnership had managed to put on 14 runs. Things did not get better.

The second pairing of Dano and Fred took to the field and immediately showed the rust. Dano was bowled off the first ball he faced, and stumped 3 balls later. Thereafter, Both Fred and Dano’s bats developed an aversion to the ground and 6 run outs came during the next 3 overs. The partnership wondered off dazed, having added just 2 to the score. Our third intrepid pair wandered in like doomed men on a sinking ship. Myself and Danie did manage to score some runs before Danie was stumped twice in quick succession. I then completely missed a full toss which thundered into my off stump (which the Charlie behind the stumps tried to suggest was actually an inswinging Yorker). Just to prove it wasn’t a fluke I missed another one in the very next over. We finished our allotted 4 overs adding only 5 runs.

The final pairing rescued some blushes, with the most solid partnership of the entire game. Ruaan and JC lost only 1 wicket (Ruaan stumped) and managed to put on 34 runs, including a massive 4 off the flashing blade of JC.

So. Grading game over, and now we wait with baited breath to discover which league we end up in.

The Action Cricket Chronicles

My employer has kindly allowed us to participate in an action cricket league. I must admit that we are just slightly more competitive than completely useless, however - I will be commentating on the games, and will save them here for all prosperity.